[The Wizard gives his reasons for not filling out the census form]

Ian Brackenbury-Channell, known as the Wizard of Christchurch, explains why he disapproves of the census.

He says the census is like the Spanish Inquisition, as it is a way of controlling the population, and he doesn't like being pushed around by bullies. He doesn't recommend that anyone else try this - he can, because he is a 'social scientist' and has mathematical proof that he 'gave birth to himself'.

He will be sending in a prophet's statement of independence instead.